I wade a lot in the ocean that is reading and play with the pebbles on its shores . Sometimes, I find gems. Carried in the torrent that is today’s life, not everybody has the time to play with pebbles. I share those gems with you, here, to save you the time of searching in the pebbles. These gems have many colors. These colors are sometimes of tears, sometimes awe, sometimes science, sometimes medicine, sometimes love, sometimes introspection, sometimes smiles, sometimes anything.
Here is such a gem, shared with you-delve into its depth of feeling.
What is a Father? Anyway?
By Erma Bombeck
A funny thing happened on the way to divorce. You know, the father who didn’t get custody and who wasn’t around too much anyway and what’s to miss?
The kids missed him. For what?
He didn’t breathe with his wife when the child was born. He was out in the lobby having a cigarette with a guy who sold real estate!
He never knew where the nappies were and when he burped the baby it felt like he had a brick in his hand. When the kids sat on the kerb and waited for him to come home from work, all he did was run his hand through their hair and say, “ How’ s it going, kid?” That was it
Whenever a child cried, you know what he did? He yelled to the mother, “Something’s wrong. He wants you.” He never realized the child wanted him.
Sometimes, he looked like he wanted to kiss the children, especially when they were hurt or at bedtime, but he hung back. Very often you felt he didn’t think he was important – just someone to wait until he got home so he could give the kids a firing.
As a mother, I wonder what is that magical elusive quality that children see in their fathers.
Is it the strength of the hands they trust never to drop them when they are thrown into the air?
Is it the calm he brings to a volcanic confrontation when he asks the children what they think before he makes a judgment?
Maybe they seed the fear that is deep inside that never surfaces or the tear that is there but never shed, or perhaps the love that is rarely accompanied by words.
I honestly don’t understand it.
As mothers we are taught that love and respect have to be earned. I know what fathers don’t do, but what is it they do to earn that respect and love?
Without ironing a shirt, baking a birthday cake or reading a story, they occupy a place at the summit of a child’s existence
Is it possible that children sense a unique human being who was there at the beginning and will remain until the end and will not be a mother – but will fulfill that rare role that is father?
I don’t understand it.
But the kids do.
A short history of Father’s day
Father’s Day falls on different days in different countries. In the United States it falls on the 3rd Sunday of every June. The history of Father’s Day reaches back to 1910 and owes its birth to a lady- Mrs Sanora Dodd. She was one of 6 children who lost their mother early in life and were brought up by their Father alone. She was grateful to her father and wanted to have a day named after Fathers to honour fathers and thereby honour her father, in a unique way. A campaign was launched and in 1913 a bill was moved to have Father’s day as an official day. The bill was rejected. Importance of father’s day was felt during and after the world wars when so many families were left fatherless. The great depression is also said to have contributed to enhanced appreciation of Father’s role and his needs-for example by buying him a necktie which he would not buy on his own-the way things were in the days of depression. Father’s day a was finally signed in as Father’s day by President Nixon.
Greatest Sorrow on Earth
This is small anecdote from the Indian epic Mahabharta-The Pandavas were once, very thirsty during their exile to the forests. Searching for water, they chanced upon a fresh water lake owned by a Yaksha. The Yaksha would not let them have water unless the Pandavas correctly answered his 10 questions. The Pandavas-except Yudhishtra-the eldest- did not care and proceeded to take water without meeting the condition set by the owner of the lake and fell unconscious by the side of the lake. Yudhishtra acted with wisdom and answered all the questions of the Yaksha correctly. Pleased, the Yaksha revived all the Pandavas. One of the questions, the Yaksha asked, is relevant to the Father’s day.
He asked: “O Yudhishtra, tell me what is the greatest sorrow on earth?”
Yudhishtra answered: “O Yaksha, the greatest sorrow on earth is for a Father to have to light the funeral pyre of his son !”
Such is the relation of a Father to his offspring!
Smile a While
Mr A visited the home of Nasruddin, said to be Prussia’s Birbal, after several years. A brought along with him a fine duck as a gift for the host. The host loved it and was very happy. The duck was killed and Nasruddin’s wife made a delicious soup out of it. The soup was really tasty and A loved it and left after saying profuse thanks.
A couple of months passed and B visited Nasruddin. B said: “I am friend of A, who is a friend of yours and who had gifted a duck to you.” Remembering the duck gifted by A, and the liking of A for her cooking, Nasruddin’s wife bought a duck from the market and made soup of the duck again, which was enjoyed by everybody.
Another couple of months, C visited and by way of intro explained:“I am C-a friend of B who is a friend of A who is friend of yours and who had come along with a fine duck. He had loved the soup made by your wife.” A duck was bought again, soup of which everybody enjoyed and C left after saying many thanks. After the guest left, Nasruddin’s wife, mentioned the price of the duck to her husband.
Nasruddin was not surprised when D visited him after another 3/4 months. D explained: “I am friend of C, who is friend of B, who is friend of A, who had visited you with the gift of a duck recently.” Nasruddin consulted his wife and she said: “Don’t you worry, Dear”
The guest was once again served ‘soup’, which was probably dish water. The guest had a spoonful and asked: “What kind of soup is this, my friend?!!” Nasruddin replied:
“This is the soup of the soup of the soup of the duck, which………..”